Google+MichelleFegatofi Google+Bdsmunveiled Protest Note Against Anti-BDSM Movement on Websites and FB by Blac Talon | BDSM Unveiled. Original BDSM Lifestyle Content - BDSM Relationships

Michelle Fegatofi 6:23 PM 18 June 2013 11 Comments

In response to all the groups who feel BDSM and Dominant/submissive relationships in general are demeaning or violence against women, I have to speak my mind, which is my opinion as a respected member of our community, and as a Master.




I would like to explain so others may better understand several things:
(for reference - Dom/mes is the collective term for male and female Dominants within our lifestyle)

First: If in fighting for women's rights, you take away their right to live as they choose to live of their own free will, you may be much more oppressive than you believe us to be. We as Dom/mes look for strong-minded people who can make the informed decision to submit. There is nothing gained by imposing control over people too weak to stand up for themselves; quite often Dom/mes stand up for those too weak or unwilling to do so. We guide those who lack strength away from predators and help them find pride and strength within themselves.

Second: We are not demeaning to women; we work very hard to provide an environment that instills pride, growth and self-confidence. We have great respect for those who choose to live this lifestyle, especially the submissives we love so much. They give us the greatest gift imaginable... themselves, fully and completely, knowing we respect them and honor the gift they choose to give. This gift is something we as Dom/mes know can be taken away if we don't hold it sacred.



Third: These groups that oppose us living the way we choose often claim that Dom/mes are uncaring people. For those people I can only say, you will never know how deeply we are connected to each other. It is because of how much we love that we are able to give so much of ourselves to the care and needs of our submissive. Outsiders have no clue how much time and effort goes into building the trust required for this lifestyle to work, not just in the beginning, but always.

Also: We are not violent. We do not act out of rage or even anger. In order to accept control over another, we must be in control of ourselves. Many of us stand strong opposing domestic violence. Pain does not equal violence. Serious questions here: Who among you has enjoyed a little hair tug or smack on the butt during sex, whether giving or receiving? How about a nibble that gets a little rougher than usual? Nails scratching down your back in ecstasy? Maybe you like hands pinned to the bed while staring deeply into your lover’s eyes; have you ever realized this is a form of dominance, and even bondage? Kinky is quite natural, even normal for people to want to feel this way.



Next: We are not barbarians; the majority of male Dominants are very much gentlemen. We open doors, pull out chairs, bring home flowers, and sweep them off their feet with a kiss when we return home.

After that I need to address another point: Not all Dominants are men. There are many Dommes and Mistresses, many of which have male submissives. They also operate at the highest of respect when it comes to their relationships. How can women's rights groups attack a lifestyle that is so accepting of 'equal opportunity'? We don't discriminate against anyone. In fact, you'd be hard-pressed to find a group or community more open-minded than within BDSM.


Finally: I'd like to address the thought of people leading the weak like sheep. Sheep are uninformed animals. They follow wherever they are led, blindly, without question or concern for themselves or others. They seek no knowledge, only doing as they have been led to do. I challenge anyone not informed of our lifestyle to become informed, to quit being led like sheep, uninformed yet following a cause when you don't truly understand what it is against. People, who follow causes without knowledge of what they are fighting against, are essentially consensual slaves, though a less informed slave than any within our lifestyle. -- Blac Talon



Post title: "Protest Note Against Anti-BDSM Movement on Websites and FB by Blac Talon"
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11 comments:

  1. I am a submissive by choice. I am agianst domestic violence and in no way is my master abusive to me. He is kind, caring and always has my best intrest and saftey at the forefront of his thinking. People need to be educated about our chosen lifestyle instead of trying to get us banned. These pages are helpful to us "new" subs.

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  2. I am a male submissive, also I am a Retired Marine Captain. I have defended your right to be ignorant and intolerant of things you don't understand or agree with. I do not stand for domestic abuse, or rape, or abuse.

    Step up accept responsibility for your own choices and educate yourselves.

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    Replies
    1. Are you directing that at us the BDSM community or at those who think our lifestyle is about abuse?

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  3. I am a strong-minded, independent female. My submission is given knowingly, freely, and unconditionally to my Master. I've had relationships in which I was "equal" and have never been happier than I am right now. My Master has given me back my self-confidence. And what outsiders do NOT understand, is that there is no Dom or Master without the sub or slave. Their power over us is FREELY given when earned. In this, we are truly the most powerful women in any relationship.

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  4. I don't have that much experience into the BDSM, but that doesn't matter that I have no idea what the heck is this amazing and different lifestyle.
    Those who are considering this kind of relationship (D/s; M/s) they have no idea what they are talking about.
    I can bet that if you're asking them what BDSM stands for they will say either the definition from Wikipedia, either something like "masochism", "weird", "abuse" or my favorite, "fetish".
    Besides, this is supposed to be a free world. I will write on my blog about this too.

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  5. Really people really? Out of all the truly terrible and unjust shit you could protest while calling yourself a feminist you pick spending your time taking down BDSM pages? Oh yeah, that's gonna make the world a better place for everyone. Go after the consenting adults who happen to like different shit with you and tell them they are bad and wrong and evil because you don't agree with their sexuality. See the irony much? No? Okay, how about the fact that you're going after women who have EMPOWERED themselves enough to be honest about what they want in bed and you are now shaming them for going after what makes them happy.

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  6. I have said this before: I am one of the original cadre who burned their bras in the 60s so that women could have more CHOICE in their lives, the freedom to live to their full potential instead of being keyholed into the restraints imposed by the patriarchal society in which we were forced to live at the time. Making the choice to live true to myself and give myself freely, totally, and with full understanding of my choice in submission to my Sir/husband was, bar none, the best thing I have ever done for myself. I am happy, fulfilled, educated, living my full potential in a marriage that is happier and stronger BECAUSE we have embraced the BDSM lifestyle and live a Dom/sub relationship. I will NOT go back to a time when ignorant, prejudiced, self-righteous, proselytizing morons felt they had the right to tell people how to live. I've lived vanilla and it wasn't pretty.

    I will NOT go back.

    I will NOT be keyholed.

    I will NOT be silent in the face of outright willful ignorance and stupidity.

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  7. I am sick and tired of the anti-BDSM asshats, who don't even UNDERSTAND consensual BDSM, trying to silence us.

    I'm a switch, as well as an owned and collared slave, AND a Dominant. (Yes, I can be all three. LOL) And dammit, nobody has the right to tell consenting adults what they can do in their bedrooms. If they think they have the right to tell us what to do, they're no better than the TRUE abusers out there.

    They want to do something, they should go after child molesters. Leave adults in consenting relationships alone.

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    Replies
    1. I completely agree. I was watching a news bit on the BBC about the heads of some of the main internet corporations around the world meeting either Monday or Tuesday to discuss how to block sites that show child porn as well as "extreme adult porn". Now, many of the feminist and moralist groups have already had a large amount of BDSM pages shut down the past week because they do not like the pics of women in bondage, in the kitchen, etc. My biggest concern is that who are they to tell the rest of us that are of sound mind and judgement that we can't do something because they don't like it? Reminds me of the Paypal decision last year to not do business with places that sold extreme or explicit content ebooks. It was ridiculous and impacted a lot of people.

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  8. It's easy for narrow-minded people to bash what they don't understand. Clearly, "educated" does not equal enlightened. At the root of all nonsense like this is ignorance, plain and simple. Anything that challenges these tight-assed people, or forces them to acknowledge that there is more to the world than their tunnel-vision views, is going to get under their skin and make them very uncomfortable. Fear is the only reaction they understand. They lash out instead of learning, reading, asking questions so that they understand another's POV. They're not capable of doing that. They don't want to do that, because it's easier to distort what little they know of history, and try to tie it into something that challenges their way of thinking. It doesn't matter to them that they have it half-assed backwards or outright wrong. If they admitted that, then they might have to think for themselves, and they might have to learn about a lifestyle foreign to their own.

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  9. Ich bin aus Deutschland und versuche jetzt richtig zu schreiben, ich habe Freunden und Bekannten vom Hashtag erzählt und verbreite diesen so oft wie möglich beim Posten, Teilen, Liken.
    Ich bin eine 100%ige Hasserin von Moralisten und andere dumme Menschen die wahrscheinlich, natürlich unbemerkt von ihrem Umfeld, hinter geschlossenen Haustüren ihre Frauen/Männer schlagen und unterdrücken.
    Ich sage offen daß ich eine Sklavin und bekennende Masochistin bin, daß ich dazu auch eine transsexuelle Frau ist für diese die Zensur unterstützenden Idioten der totale Overkill. Aber ich bin eine Kämpferin, mußte mein halbes Leben um Toleranz und Akzeptanz kämpfen und helfe euch wo ich kann, verbreite den Hashtag so wie sich eine Erkältung verbreitet. Man muß aber auch verstehen daß diese Leute nicht wissen was sie anderen antun, ihnen wurden Phobien anerzogen und sie empfinden es als das einzig Richtige.

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